“That was amazing!” The tall redhead exhaled as she collapsed in bed. The gnome just smiled and said nothing.
“Do you normally smell like campfire?”
“Only on good days.” He said as he sat up and fixed his jet black hair.
“Wait, you didn’t tell me what happened earlier today in the Wide. Does a girl not get anything for sleeping with one of the Heroes of the Wide?”
“I was wondering when you would ask.” The gnome turned his back to the woman. “If you change the dressing on my burn I’ll indulge you.” And under his breath he continued, “and if we can go again after.”
Laraelra laughed. “Artifax, do you think I’ve never changed a battle wound before? Okay, its true I’ve never had sex three times in a row with a gnome before.”
The gnome pulled off the bandages and moved closer to the beautiful bartender, “If we both stay in town, you will likely have the opportunity to do both more times that we can count.”
“Begin then and I’ll take good care of you.”
Artifax began recalling the past days events in his mind and spoke….
_ _ _ _ _
It had been a crazy day up until that point. There were parties with a guy that had tattoos on his face. I mean, when you see a dude like that, you kind of want to party with him. It was crazy good. After that we actually leveled a city block. That is a long story, but I’m sure by now you have heard it. I smelled like campfire that day I can tell you… After that, we had gotten into a fight with the leader of the Flaming Fist.
Between the five of us, I think we might have had five hours of combined sleep since the previous day… What day is it again? Never mind… Anyway, we had learned that there was a plot to blow up parliament. And as much as we dislike those wig wearing, filibusting, upper city dwelling, dick bags, we weren’t about to let innocent people die. So we headed up there…
By then we had convinced the city watch and the Flaming Lips, or whatever their names are, to work together. They escorted us to Parliament. We told everyone that Silverspoon had played a part in placing explosives in the basement and planned to use them to assert control over city legislation. When the guards checked the basement, they found our story to be true.
[Ouch… that hurts. put some of that ointment you have on it. And when you are done, can you put some on my back too…]
So they took that douchebag steward duke Silverspoon guy away. We thought that we had done a good thing and were hoping we could go get drunk and…. ummm… Anyway…
As we wandered back through the Wide, we saw some shit go down. I mean, I might actually be scarred from it had I not seen some pretty bad shit in my day. There was Rilsa on the stage in the square. And in the crowd were these… ummm.. Other people?
[Artifax, I get the feeling you are leaving parts of this out?]
I’m a mystery baby, what can I say? I’m an enigma wrapped in a tigers cloak. I put the Grrr in Groovy.
So there she was… Rilsa commanded these other individuals to begin killing the citizens in the square. She was absorbing their souls, it seemed, as everyone died.
And there we were… Tired. Injured. Horny… well at least Irel was… We did the only thing any prudent hero would do- we decided to blow Rilsa up!
[How did I know you were going to say that?]
I know… I know… But this time it wasn’t me. I swear. It was the quiet one that decided to blow things up, Azrael… I’m so proud of her.
When the explosion went off, everything went white. I felt a hand… A scaly hand, come to think of it, push me back into consciousness. When I awoke, I saw a fairly large, fairly clumsy chimera.
Krusk, Jameth, and Irel took some of the first shots at it. I thought that they were going to go down at first, but they are some tough sons-a-bitches.
When the situation was getting dire, Azrael and I made eye contact and we both blasted the beast. Kursk continued to beat on the remaining head, but it was Jameth Falconsflight that finished him off.
He was the hero of this day… and he may have even redeemed his family name in the process.
[What do you mean?]
It’s not something that you and I need to worry about. It’s a noble thing. But let’s just say that Jameth would have a prominent place in this city if he were to come home for good.
… These guys… it’s weird. I feel really close with them. They have my back. And I wouldn’t let them fall either. Especially the Falconsflight. I really didn’t like him at first, but he is a good shit. Maybe you will get a chance to get to know everyone someday.
For now, I must go. It’s morning now and we must visit Rezmir and Selebon about our caravan that will be leaving soon.
[My dear gnome, are you satisfied so soon?]
Well… maybe once more…